Tuesday, February 24, 2009

Wow. It's been awhile.

I watched Nights in Rodanthe tonight. When it was in the theater I wanted to see it with Dave soo bad. I am SO glad I didn't because it brought up so much emotion for me.

I want someone to love me like that and they never have and I'm scared never will. I never felt like Cliff loved me from day to day and it is getting more and more difficult to not have that still when everyone else already does. I hope that they appreciate it because it is something not to be taken for granted.

On a better note, Abby is almost 5 months old! I can't believe that. She is my world. I love this little girl with everything in me! If it weren't for her, there is so much that I wouldn't have done. She brought me to TN and that has been the best thing I've ever done. She brought me back to the church and that is the biggest achievment for me of the year. I hate when I don't get to be with her every day and I would give anything for Jen and Mikal to let me keep her over night already. (hint hint)

Work is work. I have the most horrible shift ever and I can't make myself have a positive attitude about it. Working till midnight and not having weekends off infuriates me. I pray every night that Heavenly Father will help me be better so that I can have better stats next time round with the shift bids so I can get something decent. I just absolutely hate it.

I'm still not enrolled in school. Once I get the divorce final (I'm waiting on my 60 days and then the court date and I'm done!), I am enrolling. I have the desire but I have to get everything settled down so I can concentrate.

Hopefully it won't be this long next. I need to make myself sit down and write more often. I will do better. I promise.


1 comment:

Jen said...

I know you're frustrated but you'll get there. Jackie, you're doing SOO well! I'm so proud and amazed at your progress. I'm so grateful you're here, we're close again, and active in church.

Love you!!